Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Camp in a State Park...Not in the Left Lane

I talk to my sister every morning as we both commute to work.  Most people wouldn't be able to stand our kind of conversation, but we do make heads or tails out of each and every one of them!

If you were to listen in on our chatter each morning, it might sound a little something like this:
(some words may have been changed to make this blog a PG rating)

"What in the heck are you doing? and this little old lady on my route set out oranges for me...Oh no you didn't just pull out in front of me, I'd like to just ram you...and I thought I had lost Mr. Meche who used to give me oranges so now I have a new little lady...Get outta my way you stupid left lane driver...Left Lane is for passing, ya fool...well, I'm so excited you found a new lady to give you oranges...What an idiot, this guy just passed in a no-passing zone, where are the cops when you need them...those we picked from Mr. Meche that one Christmas were like eating liquid gold...I have early morning duty this morning and all these people are making me late (honk, honk tapping the horn lightly to speed people up...my husband disagrees as to what this really means) I'm never going to make it, oh this man is a thorn in my side every single day no matter what time I leave...is it that old man going for coffee?...Yep, I can't stand him...Stop at the coffee shop and give him a piece of your mind...he has no idea how he's backing up traffic...I don't have time to do that (another horn blast, laying on quite heavy as he pulls into Asbury Quick Stop and maybe a hand-gesture swinging out the window that I rolled down)...there, I feel better...(both of us laughing)...Did you talk to mom?...Yes, last night...did she play-by-play from the minute she woke up...Yep, like always...One of these days I'm going to miss that...Me Too...you stupid wench...what happened?...oh some lady is texting and driving crossing the center line (honking of the horn)...You're going to kill me and make my kids orphans, texting and driving, I wish I had a train horn and I'd just blast em the 'ignoranus'...Gooooooo, these mommas in their SUVs that don't know how to drive...oh don't get me started...did Bethany get her walls painted?...Yes, and Lohn Face-timed me and Get out of the left lane ya jackwagon...oh my gosh, here's a stinkin' train, now I'm going to be late to work too...well, it's 7:15 gotta go...talk to you tomorrow!!"

And there ya have it, folks!  A morning conversation between my sister and I!  Click on the link below and get an idea of something I secretly want to do someday...I know, it isn't a secret any longer!!!

One of My Favorites


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